It’s a cracking lyric from the king of parody himself, Weird Al. A line that so perfectly skewers our cultural obsession with staying productive, alert, and just one step ahead. Who’s got time to slow down when there’s so much to do, so much to see, so much to prove?

Well, me, apparently. I’m on leave.

And instead of using this time to catch up (which is just work in disguise), I’ve decided to do something properly radical: I’m trying to do everything slower.

Walk slower. Breathe slower. Read slower. Write slower. Even chop vegetables slower (yes, I’m risking onion-induced ugly-cry-face in the name of personal development). I’m experimenting with what it feels like not to chase efficiency, and strangely, it feels a bit like freedom.

But it’s not just some lazy whim or a rejection of responsibility. It’s actually deeply practical.

Our usual impulse is to get the most out of things as quickly as possible—maximum output, minimum time. But that’s a short-term lens. It’s a kind of proximity bias, where we value quick wins over longer-term wellbeing or results.

Now, rather unhelpfully, our brains are wired for the short term. This bias, called temporal discounting, means we devalue rewards or outcomes the further they are in the future, preferring smaller, sooner rewards over larger, later ones.

The truth is, the benefits of slowing down often come after the fact. Rest now, think better later. Pause today, perform better tomorrow. Slowing down isn’t wasted time—it’s making a deposit into your future capacity.

But there are immediate payoffs, too. Slowing down lets you notice things. Not just birdsong and your own heartbeat (though those are lovely), but things like whether:

you’re actually enjoying what you’re doing
your to-do list is yours or inherited from someone else's panic
that extra coffee is helping or just giving your anxiety the jitters

So, here’s to being a little more mellow, while we’re alive. Not waiting until burnout forces us to rest. Not waiting until we have something to show for it. Just slowing down because it’s good, now and later.

No Rush to Efficiency